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Learning happiness

I always thought I needed loads of things and love to be happy! Cool gadgets, the latest games, sunny and glorious vacations, a loving dog (or two) Iand someone at my side to love.

Man, how I have been taught otherwise in the last 4,5 years…

I won’t deny that those things add to my happiness, I still enjoy all of that. But it stopped defining all of happiness for me.

I started a new life after my divorce. My OD attempt had opened my eyes. But the depression tried to keep them shut for a while longer. I first needed to work on myself before I was able to face the big, bad world again. Yes I thought it was bad as I had lost so much. And the divorce was nasty so I kept losing possessions as well as my stable life. I was scared and thought I would fail big time. Everyone always told me I could not make it on my own so here I was, on my own… Ready to fail…

And yes, certain things went terribly wrong and I learned from that. I still make stupid mistakes, I guess everyone does that every now and then. Being under pressure can make your judgement clouded and options may not seem clear when you need to choose. But slowly I gained some confidence and while I still mess up, I know I’m better than others always led me to believe… 💪🏼

Learning to be happy may sound weird. Isn’t being happy just a normal emotion we all have in us? Maybe that is so, yes. But being happy is also a state of mind, at least to me. And where I used to be happy with only the best, I’m now learning to be happy, to be grateful, with less than the best. I always wanted perfection. Now I’m learning that when something is OK, it’s good as well. Progress should count, instead of only wanting perfection.

Setting myself up to fail every time is something I did for many years. I always wanted it to be perfect because I thought that’s what others wanted from me. If I didn’t do things perfectly, people liked me less. Even scolded me for it because they wanted me to give it all and not be happy with “just ok”. This line of abuse really scarred me and now I’m learning that OK is good 👍🏻. OK is enough and if it happens to be better than OK, that’s a plus. But not the ultimate goal. Not anymore.

#Goals

Learning to be happy with less. It sounds like things were never good enough for me. It makes me a snob, at least in my own eyes, looking from where I am now. But I was not expecting perfection from others, I needed to be perfect myself. Which, for me, makes me a little less elite. Of course I hoped others would make things perfect for me as well, like I did for them. But I learned it doesn’t work that way because most people are ok with things being OK. Some strive for perfection, but it’s not what everybody wants. Well, maybe they do want it but they don’t need it. If that makes sense…

I’m learning to be happy with less. It can be hard when you’ve had a life where you were fortunate to have enough money. Going from having enough to just getting by to barely getting by can really dampen your spirits. You feel like you’re still worth all the good stuff but you also know you need to downsize because times changed and… You need to change as well. And while I still have some luxury in my life, it’s way less than what I was used to. And I’ve felt unhappy for quite a while. Worried to pay the bills. Worried to have some money left for groceries. Inflation hit me hard, like many others, and we need to make ends meet. It’s quite a challenge. But when I make it through another month, it also feels like a small victory.

Being happy with a roof over your head. With a comfortable bed. With a living dog. With a little car. With food. With water, gas and electric. Being happy with the daily like things. I am adjusting and getting there. It’s not as easy as flicking a switch. I needed to change my attitude, my state of mind, my love for the better things that life used to offer to me. And I feel I appreciate the little things way more now and that is a grand feeling.

Learning to be happy. Learning to be OK with less. Learning to accept change. It’s quite a journey but I think I’m on the right track… I’ll get there, with the occasional bumps in the road when I see a nice gadget somewhere that I’d love to have. 😇 Anyone would like to donate a PS5 with drive 😉?! Just kidding, but I’d really love to have one… 😊 Dreams keep me going and maybe someday I’ll have saved enough and I’ll be able to get one…

Being happy with what I already have is such a delight…. 😊

Thank you for your interest in my blog. I really appreciate your visit. If you like my posts and you want to share them on your social media, please, feel free to do so! I’d be honored. If you don’t want to miss a thing, press the follow button (you’ll need to be a signed in WP user) or scroll down and leave your email below this post. If you are a WP user and you would like me to know you liked my post, press the star/like button please. Thanks ever so much! Of course comments are welcome as well, but spam won’t get shared, so don’t bother…

Please be wise and stay safe! I hope to see you back real soon again, feel free to drop in anytime! Wishing you all the best. With love, Cynni 🌹

Some selfies in Greifenstein


I am living on a disability income and don’t generate an income with my blog. If you would like to support me and my work, I’d greatly appreciate it. Every bit helps me tremendously. For more information and a donation link, please check out http://www.ko-fi.com/PlaystationPixy

If you prefer to use PayPal, that’s also a possibility: http://PayPal.me/SuperCynni

Thanks ever so much ♥

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2 thoughts on “Learning happiness

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  1. Learning to be happy is definitely something I need to work on, too. It is odd to think that it’s something that needs to be “learned”, but it definitely is.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Yes I found it odd as well. But after being unhappy for a long time, I went to being happy for the wrong reasons. It didn’t feel real, even though I laughed and smiled. I was masking and feeling so alone in my world.
      Maybe through this way, it will feel real again. Learning to be happy with the small things, the precious things, with my life…
      I wish you the same real happiness and I do hope you’ll find it and may keep it sooner rather than later 🤗.

      Like

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