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Pain – Struggling more & more

Ever since I’ve been diagnosed with Fibromyalgia, well even before that because I struggled a while before receiving the diagnosis, I’ve been learning how to live with pain. Of course, I had lived with pain several times before, as I have been living with a faulty hip since the age of 16. I had reconstructive surgeries in 1997 and in 2006 and in 2008 I received a BHR hip.

And now I am scheduled for a replacement of my BHR, as it’s faulty and slowly poisoning me with Chromium and Kobalt. And the levels of that metal in my blood are giving me nasty side effects. But, the hip being bad is also causing me more pain. And the pain started to be bad in December, I got an appointment at my GP in January and now it’s July already… Even with my high dosage of painkillers, I am still in daily pains.

Tom And Jerry Pain GIF by Boomerang Official - Find & Share on GIPHY

And I know I need to stay active so that I can, hopefully, “enjoy” a speedy recovery. I know I need to keep my muscles as healthy as I can. But it gets harder every day. I try to keep going but when the pain is kicking my lovely behind, I sometimes really just want to give it all up. Head to the couch and watch TV until the surgery date arrives. But, I will have to pay a hefty price for that, I am sure, as I do believe that stronger muscles will help me recover better.

I also believe that having a decent weight will help me as well. Though I am really afraid that I may gain a few kilo’s during the recovery weeks. Almost no exercise, just some walking with my crutches… Snacks while I have some self pity due to pain…

So I struggle to keep active, unfortunately. And to make matters even worse, I am having two “running ears” at the moment of writing this. My ears itch like hell and they keep producing moist/fluid in my ears. It’s such a nasty feeling, “wet ears” all the time. I try to make them dry with a tissue as thay temporary helps against the bad feeling and itching. But it’s really nasty… I checked Google and several sites claim it often lasts up to a week and then the holes in your ear drums should have closed again. If not, then I should call my GP. Wish I could call sooner as it’s driving me nuts. The skin in my ears is being affected by the moist, and of course by me drying it out with a tissue ever time, and it starts to become very sensitive. And it’s also bothering me when I want to wear my earbuds. Fortunately, they can resist water, so I can clean them after wearing.

But the pain interfering with my workouts and walks… My ears being itchy, wet and painful… It’s not going too well and I hate it. I wish I would have a healthier body… Why do I need to struggle with all these negatives? Wasn’t the daily fibro pain enough? Ugh, I hate complaining. But after all these months dealing with slowly increasing pain… All that waiting for tests results and such, then waiting for a surgery date… At some point I would just like to be able to say “this is enough, this is it”. But I can say it, I just cannot do anything about it, besides what I am doing already… So I guess I am complaining now, as I am very much done with this. But still a little over 7 weeks to go before surgery, if Miss Rona doesn’t mess it up for me…

So I guess I will have to tough it out a little more… I will need to get through this, and I know I will 💪! But it won’t be easy. I will be writing about it, sharing my (painful) journey towards that surgery. I really hope getting a new hip will make things better for me. It will definitely take a while before the metals will be out of my blood… But hopefully I will gradually get a wee bit of my ADHD energy back… Fingers crossed 🤞 until then…

Thank you for your interest in my blog. I really appreciate your visit. If you like my posts and you want to share them on your social media, please, feel free to do so! I’d be honored. If you don’t want to miss a thing, press the follow button (you’ll need to be a signed in WP user) or scroll down and leave your email below this post. If you are a WP user and you would like me to know you liked my post, press the star/like button please. Thanks ever so much! Of course comments are welcome as well, but spam won’t get shared, so don’t bother…

Please be wise and stay safe! Follow the safety precautions, keep distance, wash hands and wear a mask when needed! I would not want you to get ill… I hope to see you back real soon again, feel free to drop in anytime! Wishing you all the best. With love, Cynni 🌹

I am living on a disability income and don’t generate an income with my blog. If you would like to support me and my work, I’d greatly appreciate it. Every bit helps me tremendously. For more information and a donation link, please check out

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Thanks ever so much ♥

Cynni 🌹

Enjoying my evening walk

4 thoughts on “Pain – Struggling more & more

Add yours

    1. Thank you! 😁 I went to the GP on Thursday and got drops for them I had two inner ear infections… Just my luck! 🍀 But the drops are helping already, though my left ear is still a bit swollen.
      Thanks again 🤗

      Liked by 2 people

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