The last 2 years I have struggled, as most of you already know. The depression, the divorce announcement, the OD attempt, the move and actual divorce… It hasn’t been a walk in the park. I needed to get inside my head and make huge changes. I couldn’t do it by myself, so I got brave and reached out for help. I got talks, meds and exercises. And in the end, I came out stronger. Ow, and 30+ kilo’s heavier…
And as most of you also know, the depression and meds made me gain that weight I just mentioned. For those using lbs, I gained over 66lbs in a year. Food was my only comfort, next to Arwen, and I was too exhausted to exercise. The meds I got made me very hungry for the first few weeks, so I ate even more. I had to know I was gaining weight but due to the depression, I couldn’t give a flying f*ck and I also didn’t see it as I didn’t really use mirrors. I hated myself too much to want to watch in a mirror.
If you have been reading my blog for a while, you also know that it happened during my vacation. What happened? Me realizing that I was very obese and I needed to start living more healthy. I tried to go through a revolving gate at an entrance of a museum and I barely fit. That was in August. In September I was mentally ready to face my challenge.
I blog and tweet about my weightloss journey. I share the pictures of me in the gym, of my body and of my health apps, like I share here with you all. In the beginning I was ashamed to share pictures of my body, as I was so extremely obese. But when I started losing weight, I felt more confident. Plus, I got many positive replies to my picture, people finding me brave, wishing me luck, following me because I was and am trying to end body shaming…
And I get messages of people telling me they want to lose weight as well but they can’t seem to succeed. And I will gladly share my experience and gained wisdom. I always ask people if they are ready to change their mindset. Most people don’t know why I ask, as they were talking about losing weight. But my experience is, it’s a change of your way of living. You need to be ready to exercise (more), you need to be ready to watch your food and drink intake and you need to be ready to live healthier. If your mind isn’t ready yet, you will most likely fail.
Losing weight isn’t something you easily do. If it were, you’d be doing it already…
Losing weight starts with a strong mind and determination. I started with getting a scale that could measure bmi, fat, muscles and all. It helps me to “see” the change better. My first steps were to see what I was doing and what I needed to change. I had lost weight before by watching my food with the MyFitnesspal app and by going to the gym and walking Arwen. As that had succeeded before (before my life took a tur for the worst), I was sure it would succeed as well. I needed money for the gym, to get a subscription that would be cheapest. When paying 2 years in advance, it would be 14 Euros a month to go unlimited amounts… Only 14, yes. But, you needed to pay it all in advance. I asked my parents if they could pay, and I pay my “monthly” fee to my parents. I get the best deal and am able to afford it this way.
So I got myself a good scale, I sorted out a gym sub and I went to the Decathlon to buy some more shirts and towels. On October 1st I started going to the gym again. And my, I was out of shape. But I didn’t give up and the first month, due to the food app and more exercise, I really started losing weight. And seeing those numbers on my scale change really helped me to get even more motivated.
Last month I barely lost weight. I was struggling as I wanted to see real results and I just wasn’t seeing it… Then came the 1st of the month and I took my measurements again and…. I lost a lot of centimeters! Seeing those numbers made me more excited again about keeping it up. But it all started not by looking in the mirror, but by changing my mindset.
So if you are struggling with your weight and you can’t keep up, maybe your mind is not ready yet to deal with the changes you need to make. Maybe there is something else you still need to finish before your mind is ready to accept a new challenge. Maybe you want it too much or too quickly, and not seeing results within a short amount of time makes you give it up again. I only lost 2 kilo’s last September, but I kept going and didn’t give up. I also lost 5cm (about 2 inch) of belly…. And now in a few weeks I have already lost 3 kilo’s. So sometimes your body needs some time to adjust before your weight will go down. It is normal, just don’t rush it! Give it time and be determined.
Make sure your mind is ready before starting. Make a list, if it helps, of the things you will need to change. Might be more exercises, less food, maybe less/different drinks as well. Some soda’s contain lots of sugar, so maybe changing to a diet kind will already be of great help. That’s where I use the MyFitnesspal app for. It made me more aware of what I eat and drink, and it might help you as well. I am wishing you all the best on your weightloss journey and if you want to chat about it, please use the comment section to connect with me!
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Please be wise and stay safe! Follow the safety precautions, keep distance, wash hands and wear a mask when needed! I would not want you to get ill… I hope to see you back real soon again, feel free to drop in anytime! Wishing you all the best. With love, Cynni 🌹
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