Writer’s block

Writing a post every day can really be a lot of fun. Sharing my day, my thoughts, my experiences here with you. It feels like I am taking so some dear friends, who just listen to me as I ramble on about my chosen topic for the post. I feel less alone, as I do sometimes, even though I have Arwen to comfort me. As much love and companionship as she has to offer, she unfortunately isn’t able to have a chat with me. She does understand some of my moods pretty well, and I still believe she pulled me through that very bad depression after my OD attempt.

But with my life, full of the same daily routine, I sometimes feel like I am lacking topics. I really want tho share a bit here every day, and I do enjoy the visits my blog gets as I never dreamed that almost 600 people would be interested in following little old me… I am really grateful and every like I get fills my heart with some joy, knowing my words have touched someone. And I do hope that my sharing my experiences with all sorts of struggles ans such, I can show people what it’s like to live with them. And that struggling doesn’t mean that it’s all bad, even if it may seem so a times…

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Train of thoughts

Some days I just want to sit down, get my tablet and keyboard, or maybe just my phone, and write away. Not about a certain topic. Not to create the best content ever to be shared on my blog. Nope, just letting my ADHD train of thoughts leave the station and run wild…

Julie Walters Trains GIF by Acorn TV - Find & Share on GIPHY

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Another day, another struggle

Dealing with “some form of depression, but it’s not severe enough for Bipolar” every day can be quite a struggle. I have used Google and also a “Dummy” book on Bipolar and that’s how I found out that my symptoms really match something called “Cyclothymia”. I have written about it before on this blog, if you use the search function on the top, you’ll be able to find them all. The most “important” one perhaps, could be Cyclothymia.

But ever since we went into another lockdown, I have been struggling with several things again, one of them a depression, the other one my physical health and then there’s the money struggles as well. I sometimes really miss having enough money to get by, as that was one thing my ex and I did have: enough to live comfortably. I guess that’s the big plus of having two incomes… And that comfort and security is something I really miss.

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Journal – Lockdown, week twenty

Sigh, week twenty… That’s a damned long time to be in lockdown. And the end? I don’t think we’re anywhere near it, the way things are going… Twenty weeks without the gym… I was very happy I had the rower, but when my leg started struggling, my happiness became a bit less. And now I have my hometrainer and I am loving it. I am getting more exercise time in, burning more calories (I will need to, as I also tend to eat more these days), watching more films 😉 This week will go a tad different than what you are used to by me, some changes in the routine, just for this week, no worries.

On Wednesday, our friend and I, together with Arwen, will try a new walking route. Seems like we will have fabulous weather for it ☀
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Weight – My pre-divorce weight

A few days ago, I was browsing Samsung Health to see if I had entered any weights from around the time of my divorce. As I was busy with a weightloss journey then, as well, and I was doing rather OK, until I got slammed with that divorce. I knew I could fit in some jeans that don’t for me yet now, so that I was a little lighter than what I am now. Because I had to buy a new scale, my ex loved my scale I guess as I’m very sure that it was mine and I had paid for it… But as I was too depressed after the divorce, I totally lost any interest (and energy) to keep working out or to be interested in my weight.

I barely even noticed that my needed to switch back to my old clothes, little by little. I knew I had a ton of hunger that I couldn’t still. I knew I kept eating because it usually helped me to feel better. I tried going to the gym but I just lacked the energy plus I didn’t want to burst out crying there…

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May has come – Measurements

As you long time readers know, I always measure myself at the first of each month. OK, I did smuggle a few times and measured on the 30th or 31st, but my aim is the first of every new month.

Even when I wasn’t losing weight, even when I was gaining some, I did keep measuring. Gaining weight is also, unfortunately, part of the journey. And when my hip started acting up, making it too hard to row, I got depressed more and started eating more. And as I could not row, I exercised less, as the gym’s still in lockdown.

Domyos 500 rower & Tunturi FitCycle 50i bike

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Weight – Daring to set new goals

When I first started my weightloss journey, my goal was to get from 106,6 kilos (September 21st 2019) to 80 kilo’s. When the 80 came in sight, my goal changed to 75, and later on to 70.

Now that the 70 is getting closer, I’m taking a look at several BMI calculations sites, as I want to try and get to a healthy weight (and lifestyle). My aim was first to lose weight and then start building up some muscles. But with the gym closed and my hip getting bad, it’s gotten a tad harder to come closer to those goals.

Last weight was 74,6 on Thursday April 29th 2021. 😊
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Almost to 320!

I never thought I would be able to achieve this… I’ve been writing for almost 320 consecutive days now. Will I be able to make it to a year? Will I be able to keep it interesting?

I wish I felt a bit more into gaming, but at the moment, I feel a tad bummed out, which results into less playing, unfortunately…

I am watching several series and movies, especially while riding the hometrainer. But they’re all older series and movies, so I doubt it would be interesting to write about those, would it?


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Review – CoolBlue & Tunturi FitCycle 50i

On Wednesday April 14th I ordered the Tunturi FitCycle 50i bike on the CoolBlue.nl website. The one I wanted from Decathlon was sold out with no clue to when it would come back in stock. So I used Google to find a store selling hometrainers, preferably a store I knew and felt good about, as I would be spending quite some money (well, it was a lot for me). CoolBlue had this bike on a nice sale, sooooo I logged in and clicked the order button. And, to my surprice, they had *next day delivery*! Even in this pandemic, where online ordering made delivery services quite busy, this awesome shop promised me to deliver it on Thursday the 15th.

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Health – Walking with Komoot

As many of you know, I love walking. Alone with some music, with Arwen or with a dear friend (or friends). But walking the same route every day can get a tad boring, even though it does help to see Arwen enjoy herself no matter where we walk. I have a few guides with several walks in them, but walking with a book in hand is a tad less easy than, for instance, walking with your phone. Chances are, you will have that phone on you anyway, so why not use it to discover other lovely spots in the area where I live?

So I went to Google and the Android Store and I went ooking for a decent app to help me with walks and routes. After a short search, I found the Komoot app, which came highly recommended by many. So I downloaded it, chose my free starters map and today, I will try it our for the first time!

This is the route my friend chose, so we’ll try it out today.
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